Desecerning a Call…what does it mean?

20150608_224256_001So yesterday at St. Peter’s it was announced that I have received a call to serve as the Director of Child and Family ministry at St. John’s Lutheran Church in Rochester MI.  So at High School youth group we talked briefly about what that meant and a student asked me how do you know what to do? How do you know you made the right decision? I was very glad she asked the question because I think many of us struggle with this as well in our everyday lives.  I am not going to claim to be this great expert but I thought for many of us in ministry it can be helpful to hear what others go through in their process to discern a call. By the way I don’t believe their is any perfect way to discern a call. I thought I would just get some thoughts on the computer screen to let others see how I discern a call.

When I am discerning a call the first and most important thing I do is pray.  I pray, I ask others to pray, and when I think I am done I pray some more.  We cannot underestimate the importance of this step. Everything in the call may seem great, the money, people, location, ministry, and good for family. Its the perfect Church. (This doesn’t exist by the way)  The most important thing I do when I receive a call is pray.

For those who are praying for me it is ok to be selfish in your prayers.  You want me to stay or you want me to come, it is ok to pray that, but I would ask you add this one part to your prayer, may God’s will be done. If you care about me or any worker going through the call process to serve another Church please pray that we will be doing God will in this decision.  God’s will is ultimately done in all this, but we pray that God will let us see His will and follow it.

Every Church worker looks at different criteria for a call.  For me it has always come down to these few questions.  Can I serve this new Church in the way they are asking me to do it? Am I a good fit?  Is my move helping the Kingdom of God? The first question is normally fairly easy for me to answer. The second is the tougher question. The last question I ask myself was shared with me by a DCE friend and it comes from a book he read. (I am not sure of the book or I would quote it here) “Are we leaving a call at the end of the book or at the end of the chapter?” This is probably the toughest question of all to answer.  This is why prayer is so key to these types of decisions.  Most of the time I listen to people who are praying also.  I listen to trusted friends and fellow workers to answer these questions. I talk with my wife and kids about these questions.  I read the scripture in search of answers.  Most importantly I listen. I listen and try to hear God speak the answers to these questions.

Lastly as a point of practice I normally make a decision at night and take an evening to pray about it one more time. If I have that peace the passes human understanding the next morning, I feel comfortable I am following God’s lead. I then start to share with others around me what the decision is. If it is a tough night, and don’t have that peace, then it is time for more prayer.  I want that peace. At a certain point you have to make a decision and you do and then you pray some more that God allows everything to go smoothly no mater the decision.

By the way Church workers are not the only ones who go through this. All people have a call in their vocations. We should all be going through this process when we think about where God is leading us to be and work. It shouldn’t matter if it is a Church, or retail job, janitor or babysitter, we should all be discerning God’s desire for us and where to serve.

So I am asking all of you, will you pray for me as I discern my calling to serve in these two places. Help me to know where Jesus would have me serve his Church. May God lead all of us on the path he would have us travel.

I didn’t hear the sermon…but I saw Jesus and shared Jesus with my squirly neice.

DSC_0004I have a confession to make. This past Sunday I missed most of what happened in Church.  In fact I apparently missed my Brother in-law Pastor say that we worship three Gods in one person.(All pastor’s have slips  of the tongue) It was trinity Sunday and apparently he made this mistake during the opening announcements of the service. I tried to pay attention, I really did. However for this service I had one job in mind. I was going to keep my niece occupied so my Sister-in-law could enjoy the service of the baptism of her son. My self appointed job was sitting with my niece and trying to keep her quiet and distracted.  She is what I would call a wild child and I love her for it.  During the service I asked her in my quiet voice if I could suck her thumb that she was sucking.  I don’t know why I did it except she was starting to get noisy and point to Mom, and I though maybe it would make her smile. It did and for the whole hymn she kept trying to stick her disgusting thumbs into my mouth. (By the way she has a tendency to stick her hands in her diaper quite often just for the visual) This was the beginning of probably the most amazing worship service I have been a part of in awhile.

You see next my niece went up with all the other little kids and saw the baptism.  It was a very cool moment. When she returned, we spent the rest of the service quietly talking about it. Most of the message I spent pointing at the hymnal I was holding and showing her the baptism picture on it.  I quietly sat and talked with her about how she was baptized when she was a little baby and that one day she would be with Jesus. I talked about how I would be with Jesus because I was baptized too.  She smiled such a great smile and laughed her little laugh all very quietly. She would point to the baptismal font and then to herself and laugh. It was pure joy. We went to communion and I got to share with my niece about Jesus again. She smiled and we had the best time together. I held her and sang a hymn to her. At the last hymn she was tired and fell asleep in my arms. When the service was done the lady behind me said “What I did with that little girl was a miracle.”  I am not sure it was a miracle but It was a great day as an uncle because I got to share Jesus with my 2 year old niece.

It was not a miracle. It was a good weekend. It was a good day.  Two things I hope everyone takes from this story. First it is ok to give up a worship service to help a little one know Jesus and allow others to hear about him. It is ok to just pack it in and say you know what today is about my niece and everyone else in the room. I know parents who miss a lot in the service because they are devoting their lives to help their kids hear about Jesus.

Second and here is my challenge for congregations.  Maybe next week when you see that mom or dad who are struggling with their small child  to listen to the sermon you can sit next to them. Offer to hold one of the young ones during the service so they can hear about Jesus.  Take time with the little ones who are squirmy. Share Jesus  with them.  It can be a blessing for all involved.

but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 19:14

Stripping paint… How ministry can be tough when you don’t get to see the end of the project.

DSC01756This past weekend I was on a retreat with High school students from Big Rapids, Muskegon, and Grand Rapids. I loved it.  I loved talking about Christ with them and on the first night we spent talking about the term whatever.  We focused on whatever we do, we do it for Jesus.  If we hold the door open we do if for Jesus, If we clean up after dinner we do it for Jesus, If we scrape paint we do it for Jesus.

We scraped a lot of paint.  In fact when we arrived we had thought we would be painting.  We came to finish this great project.  Instead we spent 8 hours scraping one building.  It was hard work.  The building was build in 1957 and had at least 6 coats of paint on it.  The process was spread paint remover goop on building, wait 30 minutes scrape, get off a layer or two,  and repeat.  If you waited too long it got dry and stopped working. At one point someone said “Wow this is hard work.” And I said “Yes and we are paying to do it!” It was hard and to be honest. I am not sure we all had the satisfaction of seeing a completely striped building ready for paint. Being the scraper of paint is tough work and not very satisfying.

So I think scraping paint reminds a lot of being a disciple of Jesus. Sharing Jesus with students, friends, families, enemies and everyone in between is tough work.  Sometimes when we spread the good news you don’t get to see it finished. even after you spend a lot of time on it.  We would love for it to happen so quickly. We would love to be able to pray, talk and conversion happens.  You don’t always get to see the beautiful building God is working them into.  You see siding that looks beat up.  You see the little bits of stubborn paint on a person that just isn’t wiped clean.  Sometimes at the end of your time with the building, you don’t see the finished project just a building you worked on.  I can be so frustrating.

I tried to tell the students this weekend.  This project isn’t complete.  We did what God had planned for us to complete.  We followed Jesus. We served and one day the whole project will be finished.  It wasn’t our job to finish it was are call to start the project.

As you think about that person, or family who needs to hear about Jesus, and are frustrated that the job isn’t done remember we all play a part and sometimes we don’t get to see the finish just are part of the process.

What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth.  1 Corinthians 3:5-7 ESV

 

God doesn’t give us more than we can handle…what a load of crap!

Screenshot_2015-05-14-21-24-23I have heard it said far too often from well intentioned Christians, “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.” I think this is a load of crap. Sorry for my language.  It makes me angry because as I sit with students this week who are hurting beyond imagination this kind of stuff hurts them and leads to confusion. I want to scream and lets just all agree to stop saying these things to students because they are not true and certainly aren’t biblical.

First, does God cause these bad things to happen so we can deal with them?  Nope! Not even close. The statement above assumes God causes bad things to happen to us.  This is certainly wrong in terms of God’s character.  God is good and God is love.  He does not cause his people harm.  The bad is this world happens because of sin.  Sin has totally corrupted our world.  Sin causes death. Sin causes brokenness.  Our sin, original sin and Satan are the cause of evil in this world.  Jesus has been working since the beginning of the fall to save his people from this sin and brokenness.  Jesus came so we could be whole again.  Through is death and resurrection we get a glimpse of this redemption today.

Second, and probably most troubling about this comment is it assumes we can handle anything with our own strength.  It assumes inside of us is this superhuman power to deal with great tragedy, loss, and brokenness.  This is a load of bunk.  This past week walking with students has brought to the conclusion, sometimes we are hit with such tragedy,  such pain, such brokenness that we cannot hope to get through it on our own.  You see for me when I am faced with the unimaginable pain of loss, and brokenness, I am brought to my knees.  This week of seeing students hurt, seeing students see this broken sin filled world brought me so low I was in tears. I am brought to a point where I am not sure I can even look up to God.  Yet I am reminded of His promises to me to never leave me or forsake me. I am reminded that although in this world I will see trouble I can take heart because Jesus has overcome the world.  I can put my hope and trust in Jesus because in him I know tomorrow will come. One day I will be able to stand again.  When I look to that cross and see my redemption I can watch as he wipes away all my tears. For their will be a day when we will have be no more pain, no more brokenness, and all will be well.

If today you are broken and don’t think you can stand anymore, and are not sure you can handle everything that is going on in your life.  You can join me on my knees this week as we look to Jesus the only one who can rescue us.  My prayer is you see Jesus and let Him pick you up.

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” And he who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” Also he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” Rev 21:3-5

Walking together…The joy of ministry and sorrow of ministry

DSC_0093This past weekend I was asked to speak the message at a former student’s wedding.  It was truly an honor to be a part of her, and her husband’s special day.  It really made me think about all the students God has lead across my path over the last almost 12 years.  It has made me think about what I love most about being in ministry.  I love walking alongside people. I get the greatest joy of walking along side people and sharing Jesus with them. Sometimes with great joy and sometimes with great sadness. Most of the time it is both.

Speaking at Emily’s wedding reminded me of the messiness of walking with people. You see at Emily’s wedding it rained during the whole outside wedding ceremony. I am not talking about that kind of rain that just gets you wet but the kind that leaves you drenched.  My suit was dripping and I couldn’t see for part of the message because water was just running down my face. I was reminded that walking with students isn’t always easy. It can be quite messy. You know when it is all said and done it is quite rewarding.  You get to see two people join as one to follow Jesus together.  You get to see lives changed and you get to laugh at the craziness of life and enjoy the moments for what they are.  Moments where Jesus can bring joy in the midst of hardships. It did make it much easier to talk with them about being children of God through baptism because I had such a great object lesson.

This weekend also marked another tough moment in ministry.  A student who I met a few times and is friends with some of the students I know well, ended his life.  It was a tough way to end a weekend.  I also thought is was emblematic of ministry.  God lets us walk with students in the good times and we also have to walk through the tough stuff as well.  I am reminded that Jesus calls us to walk in the lows and the highs, in the sorrow and joys but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I will have another post later about this week with students and about this young man. So as I end I would ask for prayers first for the couple who is starting a new life and second for the family grieving today. Ministry is tough and walking with families isn’t always easy but Jesus reminds us of his unfailing love through all of it.

a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance

Ecclesiastes 3:4 ESV